Showing posts with label really mayn?. Show all posts
Showing posts with label really mayn?. Show all posts

Thursday, April 15, 2010

REALLY, THOUGH?


Julep (attempt to) cash in.

A 'Sex and The City' inspired line of polishes (each one name for each of the 4 lead characters).
Okay... I guess.
If I was Stanford Blatch, I'd be coming for mine (...although, he could be happy to sit this one out...)
Image courtesy of honeymag.com

GETTIN THAT VISUAL??




Them jokesters over at Bleach Black have done it again with the release of their latest polish colour.


Described as a 'pearlescent, milky white' - it's been crowned 'Jizz'.


Hilarious.


...You may have heard of Bleach Black before, due to their attention-grabbing debut polish colour around Christmas time - a deep, metallic teal, entitled 'Dickweed'.
I love these girls.
These articles are equally bemused -


Images courtesy of refinery29.com

Monday, April 12, 2010

PARTICULIERE-LY (NOT QUITE RIGHT)


If you're a regular reader, you'll already know how I generally feel about Chanel polishes (which, incidentally, happens to be the complete opposite of how I feel about Chanel handbags and Mr Lagerfeld - but, I digress....)


So, here's a professional's professional opinion...


If you feel some uncontrollable compulsion to aquire Chanel's current (yet, almost-out-of-favour, as May (and therefore 'Nouvelle Vague') approaches) varnish, 'Particuliere' - I urge you instead to do yourself one large and divert to O.P.I.'s 'You Don't Know Jacques!' or 'Over the Taupe', which is almost a dead ringer for 'Particuliere'.
I took Particuliere off a client the other day. It looks brown in the bottle, ugly khaki out of the bottle and baby-dodo yellow when it's coming off onto a cotton swab. I'm seriously starting to think Karl is playing us with these colours. For real.
Half the $$'s, O.P.I.'s consistency and wearability is infallible (and the same cannot be said for Chanel).
There. I said it.
P.s. Thank you, Vogue Australia - who, it looks, agree with me - with their first suggestion for this nail trend being 'Over the Taupe'. http://www.vogue.com.au/beauty/trends/taupe+trend,2857


Image courtesy of http://www.elle.com/

Check the link for the full story on brown varnish nail trends - http://www.elle.com/Beauty/Makeup-Skin-Care/Nail-Trends-Spring-2010-Shades-of-Brown

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

UMMMMM.....


Wow.


Really??


Wow.


Where do people find the time??


Wow.


Thanks, niko for the tip-off (haw,haw,haw....)


Image (and funny commentary - because i'm TRULY speechless right now...) courtesy of http://poorlydressed.com/2010/02/28/for-the-girl-who-has-everything/

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

HOME MADE




'Home made' is taking an unexpected turn as of late, with the addition of these lovelies....


I have no doubt both of these were executed (with much diligence, focus and 'creativity') at an actual nail desk, possibly in a space that had other nail desks, surrounded by 'beauty' paraphernalia, near a front desk with a cash register at it and a large banner outside the space above the front door specifying the function of the space - but I cannot go so far as to say these look... eeehhhhh (uuuummm???) professional? (Is the Guess purse meant to enhance the lovely corset design?...).
And I cannot hold out much hope for the cashies lasting a week (if that) with the weight of those (extremely charming (yet monstrous...)) 'embellishments' mocking the diminutive nailbeds to hang on for dear life. (Pleeease, hang on (!!!) because that is gonna hurt like a mugh when they crack off - especially that twirling pinkie. *shudder*)
Oh dear...


Luckily for me, I live in an apartment and not a glass-house.


Thursday, January 28, 2010

TAN YOUR HIDE




I'm thinking there's another direction U.S. Congress could go with their current pre-occupation (that I am behind wholeheartedly...) toward deterring people from U.V. exposure via sunbeds....


Instead of hitting 'em on their hip pocket with the 'tanning' tax, Congress could do how they do with the consumption of tobacco, and wage full assault on the general (tanning) public's visual senses of what could very well be their fate, should they continue such irresponsible tanning practises.


Take it away, visual aid, Donatella Versace!


Imagine walking into your local 'Tropical Burn' (or whatever...) salon and being confronted with a life-sized D.V. eye-balling you - equal parts heckling, daring, seducing (even! hehehe...) you onto the tanning bed....*Shudder+Cold Sweat*.
You cannot convince me that a spraytan looks worse than this.
Scarred.


More in this particular series of truly disturbing health warnings over at - http://www.celebuzz.com/donatella-versace-tans-st-barts-g170191i33870261/

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

WHO KNEW?? NOT ME...


Apparently, I've been living under a rock.


In the same week my friend casually mentioned flesh-eating fish and their association to a particular beauty treatment, another friend showed me photos of her recent vacation to an Asian destination where she and her partner signed up for one of these treatments... and then I read this article....


Ummm, this concept literally makes me wanna vomit. Finally, my sister (famous (amongst our family, anyway..) fish lover and activist - I, the famous sushi-lover...) could be on the same page with this subject.


I can change lightbulbs AND tyres. I can put together large pieces of IKEA furniture unassisted. I can pull out splinters. I can EVEN do catch+releases of GIANT (jumping... oh, yes!) tree spiders (Huntsmen, for all my Aussies...), but even the pretty petals and tea-set cannot distract me from the nausea and lightheadedness setting in as I imagine this 'sensation'. I'm squealing neurotically (like a GIRL...oh, wait - I am a girl....) inside!!
I can't get with this. Just too weird.

KATY PRICE, PLEASE WATCH THIS COMMERCIAL....


Okay - this blog is about nail polish and spraytanning. Pretty trivial things, as far as life goes. And even though both are my livelihood, I try to keep a sense of humour and perspective about the importance of just where these things should sit in the big scheme of things.
....And so far as spraytanning goes, it's just soo much fun dishing it out to our hapless famous lovelies that, despite all the privilege, insider knowledge, money and connections can never seem to quite get it right. But let me tell you, the unrelenting and lop-sided criticism and focus (my own involvement included) on the dodgy side of fake tanning does tend to wreck havoc on the reputation of spraytanning, and therefore my business.
Which brings me to this week, when I was literally stunned by two complete extremes in the area of media/celebrity influence on the subject of tanning, and by association, the very, very real and responsible option of spraytanning.


In Australia (as I lightheartedly touched on in a much earlier post), we are absolutely bombarded and pummelled with all the facts, defense strategies and shock-tactic media from a delicate age about the seriousness, dangers and (distressingly common) fatality of UV exposure and skin cancers. In all of this information, I've never been so affected as I was last night.


When I saw the latest national SunSmart commercial on free-to-air television last night, I could not ignore the urge to post about it - especially in light of part of an interview I also read this week with Katy Price in which she expressed that she was fed up with fake tan and her solution to this problem was not to fade to pale (unlike this Sydney journalist... http://www.smh.com.au/opinion/contributors/farewell-the-tandoori-tan-20100118-mep6.html ), but to start going back to sunbeds.


It really is NO fun being at the end of the finger-pointing and cackling about a spraytan mishap and Katy Price is absolutely allowed to do whatever she likes with her own body and skin cells. My point is not to demonise her. But, I wonder if she seriously comprehends that because of her position in our celebrity/fame/media obsessed world (although, yes... many people do giggle at her - but, however idiotically misguided...) there are also young people being influenced by her stance on these things and will copying accordingly.


I understand 'sunsmart' education could almost be non-existent outside of Australia, but it's frightening to read that Price seems to think you can hedge your bets with cancer and believes because she doesn't smoke, she is in some kind of credit when it comes to developing the deadly disease, so she can afford the UV exposure (ummmm, last I checked lungs and skin are two completely different organs... anyway!).
Even in the U.S., where 'melonoma' is still a truely exotic, enigmatic term, they are beginning to seriously grasp the horror of skin cancer, with Congress mightily trying to push a new tax law through that targets tanning salons, inparticular sun-bed users.
Links to the full Katy Price articles...



This one of the more comprehensive Australian sites about the dangers of UV exposure and they are also the orchestrators of this latest ad campaign.


ANYONE that thinks it's okay to expose their skin to the sun or sunbeds, needs to watch this commercial first. It is realistically terrifying.


I will now get off my soapbox and back into my spraybooth.... (tandoori-spice rub 'n all...)
banner image courtesy of http://www.sunsmart.com.au/

Thursday, January 7, 2010

LUNDZAY...


The grind didn't stop over the Christmas break for the paps, with them catchin our girl 'working on her tan'.....


You may remember in a previous post, Lundzay was showin' out on the red carpet with her special white-cotton-socks tan style, and here we have the knee-high-boot extravaganza - which leads me to believe the only thing she's working on with her tan is removing it incrementally by way of completely inappropriate footwear immediately after her spray appointment.


You'd think she might have the hang of the post-spray developing ritual by now....

Clearly not.



image courtesy of http://www.mirror.co.uk/

Monday, November 9, 2009

EH??....

....this pic is making the rounds at the moment, so let me join in the fun to state my bizness...

I'm a big fan of short. I'm a big fan squared off. And believe it or not, I'm actually a fan of this particular artwork... But! Why (why?!) ANY client would want their hands to resemble elephants feet is truly beyond me.

These go straight to the 'Engorged and Disfigured' beauty category, right next to Trout Pout and Monster (let's-schedule-for-back-surgery-next) Tits.

'Bubble Nails' - ladies... are we really THAT bored??